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Chicken Maker
November 30, 2009

Dark and Horrible

Okay, as promised The Dark and Horrible Sight seen by the previous chicken. I feel that the pupils make it look more insane. The jagged beak combines well for an image of carnage. The background explodes with blood, death and evil eyes. I left the evil chicken in white for the purposes of contrast
November 29, 2009

Trauma Strikes...

This chicken had experienced a horrible traumatic experience. His eyes show his sontant shock. He doesn't even take care of himself anymore. The dark and horrible sight he saw NEXT TIME ON CHICKEN MAKER!

November 28, 2009

Doctor Evil D'Coolname

This is a mad scientist. You can tell that he's insane because of the lightning. He's probably rich too, since he's got that fine monocle on his left eye. You can't hear it but he's laughing maliciously at you even now. Also look at that crazy spiky comb. My only regret is that I didn't stretch this one down.

Not sure what you'll be getting next, but you'll get it before midnight.

EDIT: I'm a liar. I ended up finishing my stupid book tonight though.
November 26, 2009

Unexpected Thanksgiving

Back when I made my April Fool's Turkey I never expected this site would continue having content until actual Thanksgiving. As such I do not have a new turkey. I instead present this chicken in a state of shock and awe. He found this development to be unexpected

November 24, 2009

Cave Painting

I imagine that this is what this site would be like if I had been around back in caveman times... and cave wall blogging was in. Look, you can't really expect my rambling to make sense. This is a cave painting chicken. He's very dull and plain.

Chicken Punk

Well, this punk-ass kid is clearly a loser. He's chicken themed though and did up his hair and beard to be his comb and waddle. For some reason he looked Asian to me when he was black and white. I have absolutely no idea why. Also that nose sucks.
November 22, 2009

Politichicken: Three of Three: With Double The Chicken

At last we reach the final part of the Politichicken series. As I'm sure you can tell this is an Elephant Chicken and a Donkey Chicken on top of an American flag-like background. This one is all about how there is no need for that nonsensical arguing over political affiliations because in the end we all love America. That's what really counts after all, when you get right down to it. We may disagree on what we need to do for the nation, but it's the one we all love...

Except you Americans who keep saying things like "America is an awful country." and "*insert country they've never been to* is much better than America."

There's nothing against you non-Americans. You don't have anything to do with this piece though. I hope that you love your home country.
November 21, 2009

Politichicken: Two of Three

The Poltichicken goes head to head with the democratic donkey.

I don't have any real negative things to say on that note. This is a nonsense blog and no one cares about my politics.

Once more Part Three will be awesome.

November 20, 2009

Politichicken: One of Three

The republican elephant talks to the Politichicken. This is part one in my three part series.

Also, more importantly, elephants have a good number of simple tells. Donkey is a bit trickier.
Part 3 will blow your mind.

November 19, 2009

Sky Blue

I don't know why I called this one sky blue, but I did and I can't do anything about it now.
Also I've discovered that I can no longer type with the two finger seek and peck method. I also can't type properly but I'm cool with my method. I don't look at the keyboard and every once and a while my hands cross for seemingly no reason...

You know, if I wanted to talk about my typing habits I probably should have made a chicken typing something... I'm such a fool.
November 16, 2009
After a short hiatus I return with a chicken themed super hero the likes of which have most probably never been seen before.

When trouble brews he is there
When evil lurks he sees it
When darkness threatens he arrives
And with his cluck of justice...
BAM! POW! KA-CHOP-a-doodle-doo!

November 12, 2009

Squares, Yeah?

Okay, we slammed down some squares. Layers and layers of squares. Slammed 'em right on under a nice chicken shape. I hope that you understand the concept of squares, layers and layers. It's all nice and striped but no, squares. You just gotta keep an eye on it. 
You got me? 

November 09, 2009

Devious Monster

It came to my mind all at once. The horror it would show. I had to put my (digital) pen to (digital) paper before it fled away from me. The image had to come forth into the world.

This chicken has a shocking glare. The devious stare of the monstrous chicken are incomparable. Evil eyes, belonging to neither man not chicken, stared into your soul. The red lightning of his vision cracks through the mind.

The dark shadows falling upon his body bring a force upon the appearance. The jagged details scattered through the image increase the feeling of evil. At a glance it lacks nothing. When you give it some time though it feels lacking. I don't know what it's missing but there is a lack for something.

From the University

Okay. This is my first time posting from the University computers. I have rather pleasantly discovered that they have the original MS Paint. It's nice to use the stark colors I associate with that. I mean I use them most of the time anyways, but it's nice to have them as my default pallet.

Anyways today's chicken is just hanging out and having fun on a pleasant day. Basically I had no theme so I just doodled until it looked nice.

Her Focus

After a long time meditating deeply on the issues the bright light of possibility seems to emanate from her. It surpasses any dull limits she has run into. The endless focus on how to be better has simply compounded into the aura of what is possible beyond what she has already achieved.

You may have noticed that I was using female pronouns. Now I'm not sure what tertiary sexual characteristic I'm picking up on here but this one seems feminine. It's probably the eyes. Oh, and as far as legitimate ones the waddle is rather small, as is generally the case with female chickens, though the comb is rather large. Of course as a human I'm sure those didn't factor into my mind at all.
November 08, 2009

The Moze Knows

Okay someone took me up on that "If you have a guest chicken" thing pretty quickly. I'm more than happy to accept it you understand.
This is a Spawn Chicken. It was made by "mozersmozer," a styling young lad. Now he actually sent me a jpeg earlier but he knew he should be ashamed of it and withdrew it because he's all sorts of awesome. He then remade it and submitted what you see now.

Now, I like it and all but I must say it gives me the impression of a penguin. Probably the lack of a waddle. I mentioned that to him and he just shot me a "Don't need it." so I'm sure he knew. The comb feels a bit tacked on since it lacks the shading the rest of the image sports but I can't really hold that against him.

I was a fan of Spawn so I can really appreciate this one. I can also say I wish those eyes were more glow-y.

Oh, anyone interested can see the one he withdrew here. Real awesome guy redoing it like that.

Briones Sucks Now

You know I used to think that Briones might be better than me just because his looked nicer and he had more talent. But this one has restored my faith. Firstly it's a jpg which as I've explained numerous times means you just don't care. You see jpgs leave all sorts of artifacts on colors. Also the bottoms don't match up at all. I'll admit that the exploding eye is pretty good. I wouldn't have ever thought of it after all. It's a real shame that despite his talent he doesn't put very much real caring or passion into it.

I unfortunately don't have enough energy to explain to you more thoroughly right now internet but just remember that I'm the best.

If anyone would like to submit some sort of guest chicken then get me at kaloo0 on AIM.
November 07, 2009


This is the next letter in the alphabet. I bet you never expected it but H is the one immediately following G. Knowing this I acted fast and made it lime green.
November 06, 2009

Book Read!

This is a nerdy chicken with those big round nerd glasses. He's reading a big old book sitting on a table. There's even some nice dull pink wallpaper.
 Oh, I'm doing NaNoWriMo this year because I try and fail to do that every year. It's actually not going bad this time. I've got a vague generic plot and everything.

November 05, 2009


G is the 7th letter of the alphabet
Such favorites as "Great," "Good," "Geometrical," and "Googolplex" start with this letter.

Now, I gotta ask... Was the style on this one a bad call? I mean it's kinda like a chicken-snake sorta thing.
November 02, 2009

Why Not?

This one's dull and predicatble. Why is it I always come up with something so lacking after I do something that sounds interesting. Well I guess I run out of interesting. Anyways check his pupil-have.  Resuming my alphabet soon.