Friday, June 28, 2013

EPIC

Some people have opinions like the word epic shouldn't be used, and I have one thing to say to that! It's still okay if I'm writing a really long poem, right? This is the tale of Beochicken! Or at least the first couple parts. I'm not sure how long this will be, but if it's anything like Beowulf the end will be nonsense. In order to remind you that all content of an epic should be shouted mightily this is written in all caps.
Beochicken Prelude
DARK FORCES BREWED AS THE WORLD WAS HEWN
IN THE EARLY AGES THE BEASTS WERE TORN ASUNDER
BLOOD BLENDS TOGETHER UNSEEN FORMS COLLUDE
WHAT REMAINED CAME FORTH AS A THREAT TO FOWL
THIS THREAT HAD NO NAME TO OWN
BUT THE ROOSTER WHO WOULD BEST IT
HE IS FOREVER WELL AND TRULY KNOWN
WITH ENDLESS MIGHT HE WOULD LOSE NO FIGHT
LO AND BEHOLD FOR 'TIS THE TALE OF BEOCHICKEN!

Beochicken Verse I
HIS WARRIORS WERE CALLED FORTH
FOR THE GOOD OF THE DAY HAD WANED
LED FORTH BY BEOCHICKEN THEY MET THEM
AS A FOWL OF MIGHT AND VALOR BEOCHICKEN STOOD
FOES IN HIS PATH HE SMOTE WITH MIGHTY PECKS
UNHINDERED BY WEAKNESS HE FACED THEM ALONE
THOSE WITH HIM COULD ONLY WATCH IN AWE
THE ENEMIES BROKE BEFORE HIS MIGHT
THEY WENT AFTER THE WARRIORS
BUT BEOCHICKEN BROUGHT NO LESSER FOWL
THE WARRIORS LASHED OUT WITH BEAK AND SPUR
AND THE FOES WERE TORN FURTHER ASUNDER
TRULY THE LORDS MUST BE WAITING FOR GOOD REASON
THESE LANDS WERE FILLED WITH DEVILISH FOES NOW
BEOCHICKEN'S WARRIORS REACHED THE HOUSE
THE ROOST OF THE LORDS OF THE LANDS
LORDS HAD FALLEN FROM ON HIGH
THE THREAT TORE THE LORDS TO SHREDS
FEW REMAINED AND THEY HAD CALLED
BEOCHICKEN STOOD FORTH FROM HIS MEN
THE LORDS TOLD HIM OF THE THREAT
BEOCHICKEN THOUGHT ON THE THREAT
THUS SPOKE THE MIGHTY HERO
CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK
BUCK BUCK BUCKAWK
COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO
AT THIS THE LORDS STARED
HIS WORDS WERE ARROGANT BUT
BEOCHICKEN HAD BEEN NEEDED AND THUS
THEY HAD NO CHOICE
THIS FOWL AND CRUDE ROOSTER
HE WOULD BE THEIR CHAMPION AND STAND
SOON HE WOULD REND THE THREAT WITH BEAK AND SPUR

2 comments:

  1. That's quite awesome. The caps make my eyes hurt, but help the awe, so good then.

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  2. Wow, it took me more than a month to come and read this, but that is really really reall-BUK-KAW! Oh, no, I'm turning chicken now! :-)

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